Don't Trust Anyone Under 40: Your Ultimate Guide to Funny Birthday Wishes for their 40th

Don't Trust Anyone Under 40: Your Ultimate Guide to Funny Birthday Wishes for their 40th

Of course! As an expert creative writer and greeting card author, here is a high-quality, comprehensive listicle article on funny birthday wishes for a 40th birthday, based on a detailed analysis of the topic.


### Keyword Analysis

  • Occasion: 40th Birthday. This is a major milestone, often humorously referred to as being "over the hill." It marks a transition into established adulthood and middle age, making it a perfect target for good-natured jokes.
  • Tone: Funny. The primary goal is to induce laughter. The humor should be celebratory and light-hearted, focusing on the shared experience of aging rather than being genuinely insulting. It requires wit, cleverness, and a touch of roasting.
  • Recipient: A friend, sibling, partner, or close colleague. The humor implies a comfortable, familiar relationship where jokes about age, aches, and pains will be received with a laugh, not a frown.

### Invented Categories

1. The "Welcome to the Club" Collection

2. You're Not Old, You're a Classic

3. Aches, Pains, and Questionable Noises

4. For the Friend Who Still Parties Like They're 20

5. By the Numbers: A Statistical Look at 40

6. Short, Sweet, and Slightly Salty Texts


Turning 40 is a bona fide milestone. It’s the age where you’re officially wise enough to know better, but still young enough to do it anyway (and just complain about it more the next day). It's a moment that deserves more than a simple "Happy Birthday." It deserves a laugh, a snort, and a friendly reminder that while the warranty on their youth may have just expired, the fun is far from over.

Finding the right words to toast this momentous, and frankly hilarious, occasion can be tricky. You want to be funny, not fatalistic; witty, not wounding. That's where we come in. This curated collection of funny wishes for a 40th birthday is designed to hit that sweet spot. So, get ready to find the perfect message that says, "I'm so glad you were born, you old fart."

The "Welcome to the Club" Collection

The "Welcome to the Club" Collection

Messages for when you're already 40+ and want to welcome them to the other side of the hill.

1. Welcome to 40! The password to the club is "my back hurts," and the secret handshake is just falling asleep on the couch at 8:30 PM.

2. Congratulations on unlocking Level 40! Spoilers: it’s pretty much the same as Level 39, but with more mysterious aches and a sudden interest in gardening.

3. Happy 40th! We’ve been expecting you. Your membership packet includes a lifetime supply of ibuprofen, a sensible pair of shoes, and the magical ability to groan every time you sit down.

4. Don't worry, 40 is the new 30. Said no one who is actually 40. Welcome to the club!

5. Happy birthday and welcome to your fourth decade! It's a wonderful age where you can simultaneously be a responsible adult and wonder how on earth you became a responsible adult.

6. Congrats on turning 40! We're so excited to have you. Meetings are on Wednesdays, where we just compare prescription strengths and talk about how tired we are.

7. I'd like to officially welcome you to the 40s. A time when "pulling an all-nighter" means you didn't have to get up to pee.

8. Happy 40th! You are now officially old enough to be our designated driver... because you'll want to be home by 9 PM anyway.

You're Not Old, You're a Classic

You're Not Old, You're a Classic

Flatter them by comparing their age to something fine, valuable, and exceptionally cool.

1. You’re not 40. You’re 18 with 22 years of experience. Happy birthday!

2. Happy 40th! In the words of classic car enthusiasts, you haven't gotten older, you've just increased in value.

3. You're not old, you're a vintage classic! Your parts might be a little worn, but your engine is still roaring.

4. Don’t think of it as turning 40. Think of it as becoming a limited edition. They don’t make 'em like you anymore.

5. Happy birthday! Like a fine wine, you get more complex, more interesting, and more likely to cause a headache if you have too much.

6. Forty isn't old if you're a tree. Or a tortoise. Or a bottle of scotch. You're basically a bottle of scotch. Happy birthday!

7. Congratulations on reaching an age where your vinyl record collection is cool again. Happy 40th!

8. You're not 40. You're 39.99 plus tax. A real bargain for such a premium model!

9. Some things get better with age. You're one of them. And cheese. And wine. Basically, let's just celebrate with cheese and wine.

Aches, Pains, and Questionable Noises

Aches, Pains, and Questionable Noises

For the recipient who can take a direct hit about the physical realities of turning 40.

1. Happy 40th! May your back go out more than you do.

2. Congratulations on reaching the age where a sneeze, a cough, and a laugh are all a high-risk activity for your bladder.

3. Happy 40th! I was going to get you a cake with 40 candles, but the fire department said we needed a permit for a bonfire that large.

4. Happy birthday! Remember when you used to be able to get hurt and not find out about it until the next day? Welcome to 40, where you feel it immediately and for the next three weeks.

5. It's your 40th! Time to trade in your party tricks for orthopedic inserts.

6. The 40s are great. You know that noise your car makes that you just ignore? You now make that noise.

7. Happy birthday! If anyone calls you old, just hit them with your cane. Wait, you don't have one yet? Give it a week.

8. I hope you have a wonderful 40th birthday! And by "wonderful," I mean I hope you can get out of bed tomorrow without making a sound like a rusty gate.

For the Friend Who Still Parties Like They're 20

For the Friend Who Still Parties Like They're 20

Perfect for the person who refuses to act their age (but whose body sends them a reminder).

1. Happy 40th! May your hangovers continue to last longer than your nights out.

2. To my favorite 40-year-old: Keep telling everyone you're 29. Your knees will eventually rat you out.

3. Happy 40th! You still party like a rock star. A rock star who needs eight hours of sleep, a balanced meal, and a nap the next day.

4. Here’s to being 40! You’ve still got it. It just takes you a little longer to find it, use it, and then recover from it.

5. Cheers to 40 years! I’m so impressed you can still party all night. Can you let me know what combination of caffeine, vitamins, and denial you're using?

6. Happy birthday! Age is just a number, but a three-day recovery from one night out is a clear and undeniable fact. Welcome to 40!

7. Let's celebrate your 40th the same way we celebrated your 21st! Except this time, we'll pre-book our chiropractors and call it a night at 10 PM.

By the Numbers: A Statistical Look at 40

By the Numbers: A Statistical Look at 40

Use fake math and funny stats to put their new age in perspective.

1. You’re not 40. You’re only 21 in Celsius. Happy birthday, hot stuff!

2. Happy birthday! Let’s not focus on you being 40. You're also 480 months, 2,087 weeks, or 14,610 days old. See? 40 doesn't sound so bad now.

3. Don't be sad about turning 40. In Scrabble, 40 is only worth 10 points. So, it's not a big score.

4. Congratulations! You are now 2080 weeks old. Doesn't that sound so much more impressive?

5. If you were a dog, you’d be about 6 in dog years. So just have a nap and demand treats. Happy 40th!

6. Don't panic. In binary code, you're only 101000. And nobody knows what that means.

7. The good news is, you are still only half of 80. The bad news is... you are now half of 80. Happy birthday!

8. Statistically, 40 is the new... what was I saying? I forgot. Happy birthday!

Short, Sweet, and Slightly Salty Texts

Short, Sweet, and Slightly Salty Texts

Quick, punchy messages perfect for a text or a social media shout-out.

1. 40. Unfollow.

2. Happy 40th. Your back is now officially older than you are.

3. Congrats on being one year closer to the senior discount!

4. Happy 40th! It’s all downhill from here (in a fun, rollercoaster-y way!).

5. I’d be sad about your 40th, but honestly, I’m just impressed you made it.

6. Forty & fabulous. And by fabulous, I mean frequently napping. HBD!

7. HBD to my 40-year-old friend! Don't hurt yourself blowing out the candles.

8. Welcome to your 40s. Hope you like ibuprofen!

9. Lookin' good for 40! From a safe and respectful distance, of course.

### A Final Thought

The best funny birthday message is one that comes from the heart—even if that heart is laughing hysterically at your friend's expense. Feel free to take any of these wishes and add a personal touch. Mention an inside joke, a shared memory from your younger days, or a specific quirk you love about them. At the end of the day, turning 40 is about celebrating a life full of stories, and the best gift you can give is a new one that starts with a good, hard laugh. Happy celebrating